Year Ender..

And so another year comes to a close.. So what can i say about this year? I got drunk not more than 10 times (not including last Sunday's which was pretty darn messed up.. Sorry G). I finally fulfilled one of my new years resolutions which is to get a job.. And basically just have fun the whole year round.. So what can i say about this year? I wish every year is like this one.. Kudos to 2007!! This has been a very very good year for me.. I hope 2008 is way better..

Happy New Year to all!!


the 2007 edition of this blog signing out.. see y'all next year.. or tomorrow.. PEACE!!

BLANKETS

"I know we can't change the World, so let's just make a difference.."
- Carlos Antonio Mendoza Dominguez

It was all about giving and sharing the love with the less fortunate this Christmas. December 23rd Carlos, Carlo and Me ventured around the Metro giving blankets, food and old clothes to any random less fortunate people we saw.. Just like the tree kings looking for that star. Frankly, I never thought I'd be doing that on that day you know? Making a difference? But I did.. and It felt good.. It felt really good. Funny because, right after we left for the trip that's when I felt the Christmas vibe you know? and funny because I'll be the one giving and not receiving. Which is a whole different concept for me.. A whole different concept where in it made me feel Christmas even more.. Carlos, Carlo, Anton and to those who donated.. Thank You..

We are most definitely gonna do this again, so if ever there are donations for blankets, food, old clothes or whatever it is you want to donate.. mail me and I'll pick it up right away.. tha.shack@gmail.com

Sometimes, you could never imagine to be in a place where in all of a sudden, everything exists in front of you. Looking at what you've did, what you've done, and what you're about to do seems like in the same place... The thing is though, as awkward as it may sound, you've always dreamed about being in this situation. Anything and everything is right there.. Now the only thing is.. WHAT YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT?!

Prayers are most needed for my former workmate Magnolia who lost her baby this day.. Please..

We love you Steel Magnolia, and if there's anything, just give me a call..

Dad..

We've never really seen eye to eye on everything there is that we have discussed in our lives but can I just say that I love you to death and Happy Birthday.. :)

Hey Mama.. I want to scream so loud for you, Coz I'm so proud of you, and let me tell you what I'm about to do.. I know I act a fool, but i promised You I'm going back to school.. Appreciate what you allowed for me.. I just want you to be proud of me..

Forrest Gump mama said, life is like a box of chocolates, My mama told me go to school, get your doctorate, Somethin to fall back on, you could profit with, But still supported me when I did the opposite,Now I feel like it’s things I gotta get
Things I gotta do, just to prove to you you was getting through..

can the choir please

Give me a verse of “You, Are So Beautiful To Me”
Can’t you see, you’re like a book of poetry
Maya Angelou, Nicky Giovanni, turn one page and there’s My Mommy

Come on mommy just dance wit me, let the whole world see your dancing feet
Now when I say Hey, y'all say Mama, now everybody answer me..

Happy Birthday Mom!

She's the kind of girl you wanna marry
The kind of girl you'd walk the whole world for
Put her on your back and just carry
Her attitude is hotter than the earth's core
When she's around nothing else matters
Untouchable, she's got her own forcefield
Sooner or later someone will get at her
If I don't someone else will..

She's the kind of girl you wanna marry
Scientists say that she's the second sunshine
And now my life is sweeter than berries
I guess if we have sex our love will turn to wine
When she's around nothing else matters
Even if the sky was at a stand still
If I turn my back then someone will get at her
If I don't someone else will

picture this all
Picture my life and my intention to ball
Picture this ice and how it glitter for y'all
Now don't you feel claustrophobic when that chick is involved?
She changed your life - and your frame of mind
Sorry I hope what I'm saying is fine
We fuss but we take it one day at a time
If there's a fire you know that she'll lay in the line
I just, close my eyes and curve my mouth
Open my mind and words come out
You're eclectic, you're creative
You the picture girl I just painted
I got it, you name it, it's all paid for
Big castle on the sea shore, with the Willy Wonka decor
How this sound - Mr. and Mrs. Mon G..

Want to love you girl.. want to love you girl..
Want to love you..

...

If you remember, i think that was last week, when i think i mentioned that I'm gonna be a free man? Well.. I am. After six gruesome months working in a job that never really liked in the first place.. Two days ago, right after they released the paycheck and the thirteenth month pay.. i slapped them with my immediate resignation. Yezzir, Immediate effective the next day. So I guess this is gonna be one joyful Christmas after all!!

Merry Christmas to you guys! Bet You guys didn't see that coming huh?!

Perfect..

Graveyard.. The Very LAST DAY..

And so this is my very very last time to be here on this godforsaken shift. So, as i put a conclusion to my 6 month endeavor in this shift, I must say that the only important thing i've learned is.. ummm.. i dunno.. Never post anything before the system goes on a Day End? hahaha! anyway.. so far so good..

Graveyard Day 5..

One more good thing about this shift that i forgot to mention the last time is that I get to catch up on some reading. When everything is quiet and I've done technically everything that's to be done, I get to read till the day breaks.. Right now, I'm bout done with the book I stole from Cocoy 3 days ago, which Brian isn't sure if he borrowed it from Vic called "I Am Legend" by Richard Matheson. The movie is about to come out on the 14th with Will Smith as the lead, but comparing from what i've read and from what i've been seeing in the trailers.. I think I'll like the book better right after watching the movie.. Well it's always been like that, that's why I kinda pity those novelists who allow their masterpieces to be turned into a movie. Probably the best "Book-turned-into-a-Movie" was Lord of the Rings.. i have nothing to say about that, i mean, i think everyone would agree with me when i day that, that movie is the epitome of an Epic.. Specially the Two Towers.. Anyway, i'll stop it right here.. My inner Geek is starting to come out.

So on other things.. Champions Leage is about to start so.. Yeah.. Till tomorrow.. the Last day of Graveyard.. FORZA INTER!!

Graveyard Day 4..

So Anyway, Everythings been great since the last time I checked in. I finally able to sleep in for more that 4 hours, hear mass, have a family dinner complete with Sanchboogie, Sabrina and Sieg (I haven't seen them in so long) and finally me and the girl are ok. So I guess everything's been looking up.. I just hope this "OK" feeling lasts though.

So in other things, Mom suggested that we spend Christmas in Hong Kong or somewhere else. It's been awhile since we last spent Christmas somewhere else other than here. Actually I can't even recall the last time we spent Christmas elsewhere. So according to her, it wouldn't be so bad to spend it in Hong Kong just for a change in scenery. Well, actually, i don't really mind.. i kinda like the idea of spending this specific holiday out of the country just to see how much people i'll miss and how much gimmicks i'll be missing out on and how homesick i'll get! hahaha!

Anyway, So Far so Good.. 1 Week to go.. this is gonna be the longest 1 week in my life..

Graveyard.. Day 2

You know I just hate being on this shift right? to to everything off.. It's a weekend. Everybody's in Fiamma right now partying and stuff since it's Jolyn's and Boogs' birthday and I'm stuck here in the desk. Oh yeah, did I to mention that Fiamma is just two city blocks away from where work? MOTHERFU****K! And with everthing being everywhere right now? I badly need a drink..

On other things, I know I'd rather be partying that being on the desk right now but in a way, I'm kinda greatful that i'm in this shift right now (Weird right? and I Keep complaining). Well, since everything is everywhere with me and the girl, It's been hard trying to sleep for the past week.. It's just messed up you know.. It's like insomia all over again but with a whole different concept. This time, the mind is working overtime and the body is ready to shut down.. Pretty messed up really. And as much as I want to be hooked on the tube playing the Wii the whole night.. I'd rather just try and get some sleep you know?

Moving on, in a few weeks time, I'm back to being a free man. I can't really elaborate on that right now but you'll see.. I just can't wait for that day.. More on that when it actually happens..

So.. To my last weekend at this shift.. THANK YOU GOD!

Gravyard.. Day 1

It's almost 6am and the sun isn't up.. looks like it's gonna be another gloomy day..

Perfect..

Played follow the leader, keeping the steps in time
Counting on the wonder ahead, I leave the pain behind

It's on me, It's all mine
Don't go away
They're my mistakes
They're not your problem

Pinned down in this heaven, I'm dying a thousand times
Aware of the damage ahead, can't leave the pain behind

Another day, a perfect day, A twinge of pain
The sting of a needle, staring at the walls
provide a brilliant sight, through eyes of the needle

So warm at the bottom, warm never felt so kind
And for a moment or two, can't leave it all behind

it's on me, it's all mine
Dont' go away
thier my mistakes
their not your problems

Black dog, white picket fences, mow them down
And dance in the riptide, face down in consequences
Crack me up, and stay on your own side

Another day, a perfect day, a twinge of pain
The sting of a needle, staring at the walls
provide a brilliant sight, through eyes of the needle

I wish I may
I wish I might
I pray my soul
To keep tonight
'Cause all the walls
Are staring back
A perfect day
A sting for the last time...

....

There's this line i keep on telling people whenever they're confused, or being fickled about something important or just something they can decide on..

" It doesn't matter what you do, or what anybody says because at the end of the day, when you're lying on you bed alone with just your thoughts, it's still up to you on what you decide on doing"

The reason probably why I'm able to say that is because, it happens to me all the time, thus I'm like this. I'm able to look numb and all that during the day when everything is on the fast lane. But at the end of the whole thing, when the night cap is over, everything is gathered and i become this person who's vunerable enough to be pushed around.

I'm writing all this down tonight because the line I mentioned awhile ago is hitting me in a different perspective. It's just that right at this moment, 12:55 am 19th of November 2007, I realize that i have become the person i swore to not be and hate.. There's no point on hiding it anymore. I've done the damage. No matter how big or how small it is.. Someone still got hurt because of my actions..

I'm sorry.. like what i said the other night, no words nor entries nor phrases can explain what i did.. no matter how pure my intentions were.. i did what i did, and i regret it like anything.. I lost one of the most precious things i cherish in my whole life.. which is a friend..

What is my Greatest fear?: My greatest fear is that i'm not incompetent, but i'm powerful beyond measure.. It's my light that i fear not my darkness..

#40

Share the time again
I spend with you
A friend is always good to have
But a lovers kiss is better than angels raining down at me
I dream of you at times
When your by my side
Dream you're not just like you are
So troubled and doubling my pain
Just one more tear
You shed for me

I wish that i could climb inside your mind
And spend some time in there hug and hold you
And mold you into what I'd like
Lord, i can't do this
Just a kiss to spend a while by you
And a familiar smell and voice
While I lay waiting
Then you lean back and smiling
On you
Most everything you do for me, I say
And the while let's make our way
And feel warm
In the middle of this storm with you
Love will grow, angel..

Oh well, oh the friends the say oh she's good, oh she's right
I say
When you were again
When you were my friend
Before the lie,
This one
Say, say... oh yes
Yes I do
And with you
Sometimes
But while i do my best
With all the rest I leave to you
Can't wait for the hour
When two things become this
Always All this trouble from a kiss from you
I'll do it
And then you come up smiling
And I'm thrown
Until I get a little storm with you, I'll do it

Always, all the love
Lovers, line up and yeah
Impossible, but lead you go oh but a loves stole
The road to you is long and
I've been on it for a while
And I need a warm embrace
I'll take a break
And decide I want to leave you awake
Always
And you are all there
Time, I'll give it
And I feel
Tired...

Like a Diamond from Sierra Leone..

How can something so wrong feel so right..?

5 Years..

5 Years, and still.. can it be all that simple?! Yeah, today officially marks my fifth official blogging year. And frankly, for the past five years, i've been writing from the sould and i ain't got no plans of retracting whatever it is i've written, so for those who got hit.. well.. you had that coming so just suck it in and move on..

So anyway, i haven't complained about work for the past few months so now I think is the time to complain again. Today, was my performance appraisal and after six months of bloody work, i find out that I ain't gonna be regularized till December well that ain't sure yet but fuck if i'n not by then i don't know what's wrong anymore... Till December.. what the hell?!?! It's been a very very very long Six months and fuck, I don't want to even say it anymore but Fuck.. I think I deserved to get regularized.. Seriously.. I've worked too damn hard already..

They said that i've got to be more "Enthusiastic" with what I do.. Enthusiastic?! c'mon man, how enthusiastic can a person get?! does that mean they want me to prance around the front desk everytime my shift is about to start and mope everytime it's about to end?! Jesus, Man, i don't know what to do anymore.. Oh yeah, how can i forget.. I bring a "negative vibe" around the desk? you got to be serious.. a Negative Vibe?! now i don't know where this came from.. but damn, i'm sure it ain't coming from me..

To the Person who answered "Mon is Mon" when he or she was asked how i was at the desk: Well.. you don't know me so, how're you able to say Mon is Mon? Get your facts straight..