Tuesday - Wednesday.. (The Samsung, PSP and Broken Phone)

I'm not sure if it's a punishment for being blunt and shit about how i feel about working or that's how it really is but after my off tomorrow.. I'm going to be on duty from 7am - 4pm for the next two weeks. Last week, my whole weekend was spent on the hotel working because of the graveyard shift. Now, my weekend is gonna be spent sleeping early because i have to go to work early the next day.. C'mon man!! give me a fucking break!! This is just not right anymore (as if it was ever right)..

I seriously don't know how you guys became in charge. Seriously.. Fiddling with the PSP?! Uploading songs on the phone?! Friendster?! Yahoo Messenger?! when the desk is busy?! (Is that even legal?!) If the desk wasn't busy maybe it's alright.. but when the desk is.. C'mon, let's be professional here, and to thihk you like what you do for a living? JESUS CHRIST!! this is just hard to believe..


Quote of the Day..

"I have a million different things I ought to worry about, especially money, but it is sunny outside and I have just enough change for a bag of potato chips.."

- Joey Comeau

You know what Joey? We should seriously talk, because we could make the best sense of what the world thinks won't make sense, and just laugh at it..

Sunday - Monday..

I made a major mistake awhile ago that imona have to write a anecdotal explaination in the next 48 hours and pay 2 grand for it. No one has to even say or even elaborate why i made this mistake. Stupidity? Nah.. I'm too smart for this mistake, too busy at the desk?.. Maybe.. Lack of Enthusiasm and lazyness because I hate my Job?! BINGO! I can't see anymore explainations on why i comitted such a mistake, because seriously, going to work becomes harder and harder everyday. If it was just that easy to resign and leave.. And yeah, i missed mass again today, shit.. this fucking sucks!

Magnolia: You know If miss Mea heard/read what you just said/written, she wouldn't be pleased..
Mon: Ok..

....

I don't normally write twice in one night. I sometimes just save it for the next day and just put it as a draft so that if ever i have nothing to write, i just post that down. But it think tonight i'm making an exception.

Just now i realizer that, i'm actually depressed because of work. And just so that you know, i'm not the type of person that gets depressed, Angsty yeah.. but depressed? never. This is actually the first time that i feel bad about what i'm doing. A few months back, i was just frustrated and annoyed with what I do.. now i think it already hit the depression level (Not Suicidal ok!!). I mean i can't even write properly anymore. It's just sad really.. i never thought that it would actually affect my writing. But anyway, i'm an inch closer to resigning.. i'm giving myself two more weeks and this is final. Two more weeks and if i still feel this way then that's it. I'm done with being a front desk officer..

Now It's proven that, i will never be happy unless, i work in the kitchen. I just can't work in a desk with shifting schedules. Maybe shifting schedules in the kitchen yeah?! but in the desk.. nah, i'll pass, it's all yours, whoever wants it.

Checklist after Resigning:
- SHAVE HEAD
- SEE THE GIRL
- LOOK FOR NEW JOB
- PLAY FOOTBALL
- PLAY BASKETBALL
- PLAY GOLF

Day Off.. Yeah Right..

I don't know how long i can take this anymore. Just last night, i told my duty manager straight up that I'm not happy with what i'm doing. Actually, that's like the soft version of what I said. What I actually said was "I Hate My Job" and I hate it with a vengeance.. Maybe, It was the effect of being in the graveyard shift that i was able to really say what I felt but I don't know, maybe i just really wanted to tell him already.. He asked if i was going quit already, i said soon but not now.. That actually felt good you know?! at least they already know what i really feel.

Anyway, today is my so-called "Day off".. Today, since i was graveyard i got home at around 11am?, and i have to go to work at 7 am tomorrow?! Is this day off just for formalities sake?! just so that you can write down on the schedule that i technically had a day off? And i'm working seven days straight next week? *Shakes my head in dissapointment..* Why not just shoot me in the head right now?.. sheesh...

Lastday...

So today marks the last day of my graveyard shift after a really long time i hope.. actually.. i hope never again. Tomorrow is my so-called "day off" since i'm going to be sleeping the whole day and i got work early on Thursday.. *shakes my head in dissapointment* So, the revised schedule for the next week is already posted and like my sched this week, i'm going to be working for seven straight days again since my "off" next week will be moved to Thursday.. I actually can't seem to understand why my "off" keeps on moving when i haven't requested it to be moved.. I'm guessing i'll be working seven straight days again next week.. Actually, i'm not guessing anymore, i'm already expecting it to be like that. I'd be happy with this set up if I was actually getting paid more.. *again.. shakes my head in dissapointment*

On other things, Karina, since she works for a manpower agency who ship people abroad, got my resume and submitted it to some hotel in the UAE. I hope i heard her right, UAE.. because she might have said Kuwait and if ever she did we're gonna have a serious problem.

Anyway.. off to Ever Ever Land! a place where you're underpaid and overworked with a horrible schedule!

Graveyard Shifting..

Tonight is going to be my third night in the shift and frankly, i seriously want to give up and report sick already. I hate this fucking shift.. I fucking hate it with a vengeance! Also, I actually hate that fact that I don't have a choice since everyone has got to pass through this at least once a month and from how i see it, i'm the only one who's not enjoying this shift. It seems that everyone likes this shift since it's not stressful and all that.. I still say crap! Just shoot me in the head instead of putting me in this shift.

Anyway, on my very first day of this shift i was with this workmate who, i swear to god if he wasn't my OIC, i could have punched him because of lack of sleep.. ok, he maybe ok at first but now.. actually, he's not ok, since he never was and he is a closet case, tolerable is more like it. He's tolerable, but now that he suddenly aquired a superiority complex, i swear.. one more out of him and i'll fucking hang him upside down. Apparently, he's trying to copy the old front office supervisor "Abi" who he idolizes so much and in which according to him is.. well a bitch since i ain't got any more words to describe how she is from how he described her. She's a perfectionist according to him. A perfectionist to a point where she acts like a bitch if she doesn't get what she wants. For her sake, thank the Lord Jesus that she already resigned after i got in.. so here..

"Dude, trying be her most definately won't make you her, and trying to act like a perfectionist doesn't make you one as well, so i suggest you to stop it, because it just makes you look more of a faggot that you already are..

Catch my drift?

Anyway, on other things.. After missing mass for almost a month, i was finally able to hear mass yesterday. Thank God! Maybe this is the only good thing about the graveyard shift! moving on.. It feels good to be able to hear mass again after missing it for three weeks.. I feel less of a sinner now.. hehe.. moving on.. well, my social life is offically down the dumps.. that shit doesn't exist anymore.. so i ain't got nothing to say about that..

Ciao...

Saturday Eveneing Bluees...

Tonight's Gimmick List:
Joni - Hang out with G and Noy and Someother people then to Bea's
Tin - Hang out with her Girls
Wowie - Museum trip with Aby then a Gig
Aby - Museum trip with Wowie then i dunno..
D7 - Probably Ton's house
The Roots - Probably poker at JP's
Sieg - Working (But he works in Alabang so that doesn't count)
Mon - To Oxford Suites Makati to work since he's on Graveyard shift today

Of all the days that i could have been placed on the graveyard shift, I don't understand why it had to be today till Tuesday. And on Wednesday since it's my off.. i'm gonna be sleeping the whole day, and on Thursday, my schedule is at 7 in the morning till 4 in the afternoon (So much for my off).. Seriously, i can't seem to find anything right about this situation i'm in, Seriously. Miss Mea, If you are reading this right now, do i complain too much?! at least do i complain right at you grill all the time? I mean yeah i've been absent a few times since i got in, but c'mon this is just not right. And of all the people to be in shift with! you put me up with CAST?! C'mon man!!! This is just so wrong.. AND TO TOP ALL THAT IT'S A FREAKING SATURDAY!! JESUS CHRIST!!!

Thursday..

So today.. i skipped work due to a "swollen knee".. or so they know. Actually, I could have just walked it off if i wanted to but hey, this is just the perfect opportunity to get a sick leave.. even if it's just for one day.. just to again, experience having a week with two off days instead of one. And seriously?! i fucking miss my weekends! seriously!!! Jesus Jones!! if only i had two days off in a week, i'd won't still be contented but hey, at least i get two days off right?!

Dude1: But you don't get paid when you take a leave right? at least not yet?
Mon: Yeah, and quite frankly i don't give a shit. It's just such a nice day to spend it listening to complaints and annoying Koreans..
Dude1: True that..

Anyway, the relatives that's been boarding here in the house for the wedding for the past week are one by one leaving and heading back home (so that's either Cebu or Surigao). This morning it was Grandma, Aunt Evangeline and Uncle Samson. Tomorrow it's Aunt Daday and Aunt Shirley and finally on Saturday it's Cousins Nina and Mia. Actually, since they arrived last week i have been sleeping on the couch or on the floor or on a sleeping bag along with spaceman. But moving on, It actually saddens me that they're already leaving since, i wasn't really able to hang around with them because i got work. And the last time we saw each other was what?! 2-3-4 years ago? i'm not really sure.. so i'm just thankful that the clan isn't complete this time around beacuse if they were? and i was the only one not present? Daymn... i'd be the saddest man in the world.

Aunt1: Why not take a leave from work so we can all go to that new big mall near the coastal road?
Mon: For how long?
Aunt2: at least 3 days? just right after the wedding
Mon: I can't.. sorry
Cousin1: But we haven't seen you in so long!
Mon: Yeah, I know.. so i'm really sorry..

They say i have to get used to the mentality of Work-over-Family not unsless the occasion is crazy like the Wedding or a Funeral. I say CRAP!

So... C'est la vie!

25th and it goes on..

According to stories from him, her and some other relatives, 25 years ago, he borrowed 5,000 pesos from his uncle so that he could finally get married to the girl of his dreams in a small church within the University of the Philippines. Of course, 5,000 won't cover as much so the wedding wasn't as grand as she wished it would be. A little flowers on the aisle, a red carpet, a few relatives and friends a simple reception right after. It's a wedding nonetheless so it was ok for her. The vows were still said, the rings were still given and the kiss was still well.. kissed, so what's the diff right? Though of course like any other girl, the dream of a grand wedding was always there.. She didn't have to say it, because he already knew..

25 years after. after four kids, 1 almost daughter in law and a handsome grandson. He fulfilled her dream of a grand wedding, in a big church, with all of the flowers the flowershop could provide, A really long red carpet, and a grand reception right after with Everyone invited. Eventhough she never asked him for a wedding like this after 25 years of being together, he gave it to her nontheless.. Good Job Dad..

Happy Anniversary you guys..

like what i said in my speech..

"I may not say it often, but i mean it everyday.. I love you guys.."

and Mom, Tita Jojo was there.. don't worry..

Tuesday-Wednesdsay..

Won't be able to blog tomorrow since tomorow is Mom and Dad's 25th Wedding Anniversary and it's just not right to not blog tonight. Anyway, Kathleen Anne is reading my blog right now so, hello Kat!..

Congratulations to my Mom and Dad!! to 25 more years!!!

Sunday..

Sundays are supposed to be the unofficial "Steady" day in the hotel. Well, technically it was, it's just that i wasn't in the mood to work.. It's not that i'm always in the mood to work because.. i never am, it's just that today, it's i'm not in the mood twice as much as i'm not in the mood everyday.. For the record, i didn't screw up considering i was technically surfing th net every chance i get which is every 10 to 15 minutes at a time.. Fuck! I ain't gonna even say it anymore..

Today's Briefing as of 3pm yesterday:

People to Check In: 12
People to Check Out: 5
Occupancy: 71%

I need a new Job...

Highschool High..

I accordance to Vic's recent post about our "so-called" high school, until now, i still cannot believe i survived three good years there. I say good because eventhough it maybe just a big house compared to the usual school building, and the curriculum just won't pass the minimum requirement of the US School board standards, how many people can say that "I technically have done everything i wanted to do legally and illegally inside the school without getting caught? or if ever with minimum sanction?" hahaha!! anyways.. TO HIGHSCHOOL!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!

Wednesday.. Midweek blog..

It seems that this midweek blogging is becoming a trend.. hmm.. not bad.. at least i get to blog semi-regularly. Anyway, It's the first time in a long time that i checked my multiply and i came across Bri's site, and i just realized.. DAMN! the fucker is still in the states! God!! LUCKY SHIT!! Eventhough a little piece of me is saying that i don't want to move there.. right now? GOD i wish i was back there.. with a freaking good job or at least a job that i like. Seriously speaking.. i think i already mentioned before that i drag myself to work everyday.. but now.. it's getting seriously worse.. i literally have to have anyone or everyone drag me to work everyday.. it's been what?! just a month and a half? and i feel this shit already?! JESUS JONES MAN!! This is not good!! this is not good at all..

On my way home from work last night at around 12 midnight, i passed through Ayala Avenue and just when i was waiting for the traffic light to turn green i just saw myself staring at Shangri-La Makati while wishing, "Damn I don't mind having a schedule like this.. as long as i'm working in a place like that..". It just saddens me to see that beautiful place just a few blocks away from the crappy ass hotel that i'm working in.. Shit.. i should quit already and start applying somewhere else..

Soundtrack.. Seeyousoongravediggergreystreetbartenderabsinthepartyattheflyhoneywarehousethefixeltorrete

I was supposed to go like i said.. but I just couldn't, i just can't.. it's just too hard. I'm so sorry.. have a great life back there though.. hope to see you in time years time or whenever. We never ended everything properly but i guess thats for the best.. hey.. at least you we got something to look forward to thee next time we see each other.. if ever we still see each other.. Take care of yourself you hear?

Wednesday.. Midweek..

So officially, i've worked 8 days straight last week just so that my off be moved to every Wednesday to accomodate my mother's wedding three weeks from now, and it'ss just now that i feel the serious stress of doing that. I never want to do that again.. Seriously.. it's just bloody hell. Anyway to more things that matter.. Yesterday, Tito George came home from the states after being gone for five years to pay respects to his wife who just recently passed away. According his kids he took it pretty well.. but while i was speaking with him last night i can just feel that he's bout to burst into tears with just a little more drama.. well.. seriously who can blame him..

On other things.. My colleague Kaye got a memo this morning stating that she's bout to get a salary deduction of 20,000 and a suspension on the 28th for negligence.. ok, why 20k? because apparently, she gave 20,000 worth or refund to the guest without having him sign a form stating that he got 20k and then since the from wasn't signed he asked for another 20k worth of refund.. and when we tred to get the refund back.. he denied that Kaye already gave him one.. so there you go.. go figure.. poor Kaye though..

Sunday..

We were never close yet, she was always here.. It's like loosing a second Mom.. Tita Jojo, at least your in a better place now. A place where depression does not exist and a place where you'll eternally be happy.. Say hi to Jesus for me..

League Champions..



Finally, after four years of waiting.. We're back on the TOP!!!!

1 Month..

So tomorrow, i'll be offically employed for a month.. And considering that i don't like doing what i'm doing right now? i can actually say that i'm doing a good job. I dunno, maybe that's just from my stand point, but from how i see it.. yeah.. everything is cool.. i'm runningg for the top upseller for the month.. and it's my first month. Though i'm still hoping i get an offer in the kitchen, or something hotel related but here in Alabang.. I seriously don'y mind doing this you know? as long as it's here in the vicinity.. Makati is just too damn far and too damn expensive for my puny ass salary.

Anyway.. Today's Convo with Karren my colleague:

Karren: Don't you just wish we work back in Alabang?
Mon: Isn't it obvious that i wish for that shit everyday?
K: Oh yeah.. hehe you're the one with the most complaints here..
M: Your one to talk.. Miss "i'm sick and i'm skipping work tomorrow".. Bullshit!! hahaha
K: Whatever..
M: Yeah.. Whatever..
K: Imagine if we were back there.. it would be easy for us to just say.. "let's hit starbucks right after work!" and not worry about the stress going home..
M: Yeah.. Whatever..
K: No Seriously..
M: Yeah, I Guess your right.. that shit would be nice
K: Yeah..
--Long Silent Pause for Contemplation--
M: Oh shit someone's bout to check out.. heeeree we go..

Soundtrack:HerecomesthesunBartenderLieinourgravesGraceisgoneGraystreetIdeaofyou

The Kingdom Crumbles and Roerto Carlos' last Press Conference as a Madridista

King James' Kingdom crumbles over the Spurs as they get swept in a hard fought game in Cleveland. Tony Parker is one lucky bastard.. Eva Longoria, The NBA Championship and the NBA Finals MVP.. Son-of-a-bitch.. what the hell can you fucking ask for?!



Yesterday it was Roberto Carlos' last Press conference with the White's after 11 years in the club. It's sad for me as a Madridista since he is the reason why i am. I always thought that he would end his career in the white and black shirt but i guess i thought wrong.. Madrid playe or not, i will still be a Roberto Carlos Fan. I wish this player the best and hope that they win the league title this Sunday.. HALA MADRID!

Thursday..

The Club bill just arrived and again, like always.. it's me who gets it. Seriously.. AM I THE ONY ONE WHO USES THE CAR AROUND HERE THAT ALL THE GAS BILLS ARE MINE? c'mon, for once, let's be realistic pops! I don't understand why it's always me who get's the shit when the club bill arrive.. Anyway.. nothing to blog again.. Tomorrow i hope something good happens.

Wednesday..

I clearly remember it like yesterday.. My very very first day as a college student. Orange Shirt, orange Bag, orange fisherman's Hat, baggy shorts, white sneakers and my ever so faithful CD walkman with a set of headphones.. Oh yeah, i was with Brian, JJ and John.. My neighbors and blockmates. I dunno with them but I was so eager to go to my first class and it was just General Psychology, i wasn't even close to the major culinary classes in my flowchart. Anyway, I'm posting this beacause it's been six years since that first day and now that i'm already working.. i wish that, that day would come back, because during those days, i could honestly say that the world was mine. I didn't have any care whatsoever of what's happening, I didn't have so much priorities in my life compared to now. All i had to do was go to class, pass all my subjects and as long as i had my CD player with me and my Orange Hat with me.. Everything is all good..

Good Luck on your first day Banana Pancakes..

Tuesday..

So, this is how it feels to have an extra off huh? you feel more compelled to go to work since you experienced two days without it, and you haven't experienced this in a long time. Anway, tomorrow i'm back to my usual PM shift.. Less stressful but even less time for my family and friends. Hay.. what can complaining do anyway? so screw it..

Anyway, i'm off to watch the tube.. there's nothing really to blog about today since i didn't do much.. so..
Ciaao!

Ps. Good talking to you LAS.. we'll talk again soon! and Thank you.. :)

Monday..

In my whole life, i always thought that there can only be just so much optimisim in a person, that it would only last until something really fucks you up. Well, that's what i thought up until I met my colleague Sid, which i think.. or let me say i know for a fact is overflowing with optimisim, and no vein of pessimisim in her system. As a realist, I never really consider those two facts of life, i just base my shit with what's gonna happen and what's happening now because of what i did, what i'm doing and what i'm going to do because honeslty, it's because of those three things are thye reasons why everything that's happening to you is actually happening to you..

Maybe i'm just babbling nonesense and not getting my point across, but it's just that it's the first time i've met a person wherein she lives in the dream world where there are no problems and everything is "Hello Kitty-ish" and everything is perfect, even if according to her.. she has a complicated life. I just don't understand how she survives the world with that kind of mindset..

Anyway , today's my off.. and so is tomorrow.. thank GOD! i guess he heard my prayers last night in church..

Sunday..

Yesterday aternoon was just great compared to this afternoon where i just spent the whole time sleeping.. Slept at 10am woke up at 4:30 in the afternoon. A hate this feeling you know? wasting the day sleeping wherein i could be doing something more productive like spend time with the family since it's a Sunday yeah? Anyway, thank God this is my last day in the graveyard shift in awhile and come Tuesday, i'm back to being in the usual PM shift..

I don't want to sound redundant but yeah, work sucks like anything. Especially yesterday where Kaye wasn't actually feeling good, sooo the newbie that i am, i had to do almost everything by myself (they say it's training, i say it's crap). So, instead of finishing with the paperwork i had to file a good hour and a half right after my shift started, i finished after 3 hours. Honestly.. the only good thing that happened in my shift is when this Spaniard checked out at around 3:30 am? and he gave us 500 bucks for a tip. We had Wendy's deliver us some food with that 500 bucks just so you know.. a Bacon Mushroom Melt with Iced Tea and Fries at 4:00 am.. How healthy is that..

Anyway.. till i complain again tomorrow.. and yeah, i'm not missing the Mass this time..

Saturday..

One fine Girl+ A trip to the Independence day bazaar + 2 Banana Splits +some Calamares and a Cup of the worst tasting Cappuccino i've ever tasted in the world= One Fine Day..

I can't ask for anything more..

Friday...

So Yesterday was the first day of the graveyard.. You know, I love to watch the sun rise on me yeah? but i just don't like it if the circumstances are when i'm either working or i'm just stressed out and I really want to sleep already but i just can't.. So in this case i'm working so go figure. Well, anyway in terms of efficiency at work, considering that I started doing the paperwork that had to be done at around 11:30 pm and I finished at around 12:30. So that just meant that from 12:30am onwards till 8:00am Me, Kaye and Cast weren't doing anything anymore.. Me and Kaye were literally looking for something to do, Cast was technically on the phone the whole time so whoopie for him. Hay.. And i'm bound to do this till Sunday.. I seriously don't know how long I can last doing this shit..

Anyway, today starts the YE Pilar and like most of the things in my life that i'm going to miss right after taking this job, i'm bound to miss that. It's supposed to be fun but yeah, i don't want to get started on that.. And yeah, today is Friday i'm gonna be missing that as well.. along with this Saturday and Sunday.. Shieet

Thursday..

Today starts my dreadful Graveyardshift. Thankfully the rents are generous enough to have my older brother bring me to work today. I don't really know but, according to my colleagues at work, you don't really do anything during graveyards.. basically you just fix a few paper work for the next day and your all set to bum the whole night. Frankly, I don't give a fuck, I'd rather be home doing nothing than be at work doing nothing and wishing i was home doing the same thing.

Well anyway, last night, after hanging with Vic and after the visit.. I went to Los' house to have a few beers.. Actually it's just supposed to be just one, but we ended up drinking at least four. Last night's night cap was actually what i really needed.. you know, a "few" beers and there ain't too much topics crossing over the conversation since we're just two so wasn't any information overload.

Anyway, off to work.. fuck..

Tuesday..

Today wasn't as different as the other days. Though today's occupancy wasn't as dreadful as last Sundays. Anyway, Today's shift I was with Kaye, and for some reason every time i'm in a shift with her, she makes the shift really worth while. Of course Em and Kathleen are just the best but it's just different with Kaye. Don't get me wrong, I don't have the Jones for Kaye, it's just that she just makes my job easier. She makes it a bit lighter in the sense that, i just tend to forget that i'm busy. Which is a good thing.. Since I don't really like what I do..

Anyway, while there wasn't anything going on, Me and Kaye started talking about how it was back in college and all that. And from that conversation on till right now, I still have this thing that, for some reason? i seriously miss college. Maybe it's because of the people i hang around with during that time or maybe it's just the great Chef's Jacket that i always wear in school (Which i know i will wear again soon).. or maybe it's just College in general. Maybe i just had so much fun in college that i kinda miss it.

Anyway, tomorrow is my last AM Shift for the next 2 weeks.. i'm off to graveyard on from Thursday all the way till Sunday.. I'll try blogging in the office..

Peace!

Monday..

The day off is composed of watching TV and basically just lounging around the house.. Wish i could have done something better.. This is officially my third week on the job and frankly eventhough i don't like what i'm doing, i'm actually starting to get used to this shit. Still eventhough, i got that 1 month thing standing. Oh yeah, that one month thing if i forgot to mention is, i'm giving this Job a month and if ever I still feel like shit every single day then i'm calling it quits. Anyway, so far it's still steady.. As long as they keep me in the PM shift or the Midshift i'll be alright.. just not AM's and Graveyard's in which can i just say that, i'm starting on Thursday. Yes ladies and Gentlemen, tomorrow i start A.M. till this Wednesday and from Thursday till Sunday i'm heading for the Graveyard shift.. Shit..

Oh Well.. C'est La Vie..

I don't want to post something that I would AGAIN regret because you won't be able to understand it or you'll refuse to understand.. so here.. another from a softer world..

I AM NOW A WITNESS..

Saturday..

I just don't know, maybe i'll get used to working on Saturdays and Sundays since i have a shift tomorrow, i just don't know.. I don't even think i'll be able to hear mass tomorrow because of this shift.. If ever, I'm sorry if i won't be able to. Anyway, I get the concept of working during weekends since hotels don't close but yet i refuse to accept it. I just need the weekends.. Times like these i wish i had a desk job, at least i get to sleep late on Fridays and slack off on Saturdays and Sundays.. Oh well..

Tonight is the One Way official 1 year Anniversary Celebration and i'm going to be late. As one of the Scribes, I don't think i have any excuse of being late, even though I have work and all that.. They're going to Re-Screen the whole show. FUCK!!!! I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE I'M GOING TO MISS THAT!... HAY..

Anyway.. this shit is getting tiring and redundant and i'm off to work..

Ps. I just got my paycheck yesterday afternoon.. and frankly.. i'm not happy..

Another Day Another Blog..

Yesterday was the Flores de Mayo celebration here in the villa and I was supposed to play a set with the Youth Praise Ministry. But of course since there's work, i've got to miss that and all. According to a friend it was fun, a lot of food was served and there were dancing and games. Oh well.. i guess that's a first of alot of shit that i'm headed to miss in the next few months.. oh well, at least i'm getting payed.. even if i'm underpayed with all the shit that i do.

So it's another Friday, normally i should be happy that it is. But right now i'm not so sure if should be, since i got work the next day. I just wish i have my weekends back and it'll be all good. I wouldn't mind working late nights and all that, as long as i have my weekends back, hay.. oh well.. off to work..

Well.. Ok..

Left for work at around 5:00 a.m.

So today, i ventured into commuting to work for the first time. And frankly, this first timer ain't happy. I rode a Skyway bus that was headed for Makati in the Metropolis station at around 5:20 in the morning since, according to my Mother whom i love so much.. if i rode that bus, it would stop in a bus stop adjacent to my workplace.. Well that's according to her.. But according to the Metro Manila Development Authority or MMDA, that bus stop causes traffic, so to make the long story short.. They took that bus stop out and moved it somewhere farther. I went past that bus stop, walked back a few kilometers.. then headed for Ayala Avenue and rode a jeep where i thought they'd be turning right to Makati Avenue, And then went down the Ayala Strip to wait for non existent jeeps that pass through Makati Avenue for a good 20 minutes, and when i finally realized that there wasn't any jeeps passing that way, i just lit a stick and started walking the 3 kilometer stretch to my office.. Hay, i should have taken the car..

Got to the office at around 6:50 a.m.

The Bus Ride..

Before actually getting all stressed up in Makati, the bus ride from the terminal to the Central Business District was kind of nostalgic and somewhat nice. I remembered how it was getting up before the roosters started crowing for a 7am class to school and rushing to the station to get the first bus to Manila.. I still remember it, the Juaymah-Maureen bus with it's green and white stripes a logo of a weird elephant that's dancing. I still remember before, that when that bus hits the Skyway, i look at the lovely sunrise that's hitting the CBD of Makati and I start wondering.. "when" and after the toll, the bus goes past the first, second and third exits and heads straight for Manila and then Boom.. back to reality..

This morning i got the same feeling back but instead of a "when" it was a "now" with a nod. And instead of missing the exits, i went through the first one and it headed smack dab on the side of the CBD where the stress started. Actually, in a way it feels good, knowing that i already head there instead of heading for the last exit to Manila. Knowing that i'm already living that daydream of actually working in Makati. Eventhough i'm still kinda hoping that i'd be heading there in different circumstances, i'm already there nontheless.. so whatever.. i guess, i'll just make the best out of it.. or until i still can..

Anyway.. Tomorrow's another day..

PS.. Hey Bea.. i don't know why, but other than reminicing, i was really thinking about you the whole trip to work.. I dunno.. maybe i miss you.. or maybe I REALLY miss you.. or maybe we should talk reaally soon.. so here.. i got this off the "a softer world website" since it reminded me of..

Work.. (Week 1)

My Prayers have been answered..YES! i have a job already. Finally, my rents are off my back.. or so i thought. I'm not a chef in a hotel or in a restaurant though (but i'm currently working on that), I'm an F.O. in a Hotel smack dab in the middle of the RED LIGHT district in Makati. Nice noh?! According to my good friend Krizia "I have such a cool and glamorous job".. Ok.. sabi mo eh!

To tell you the truth, i'm thankful that my prayers of finally getting a decent job has been answered but this is not what i want to do.. and everyone knows that. On my first day last Monday, i wanted to quit already.. imagine what i'm feeling right now. The people in the workplace is nice don't get me wrong. I'm not being mistreated or whatsoever, it's just that for me, in order to be efficient in what you do, you got to love what you are doing. And frankly.. i don't like what i'm doing.. i'm actually in the verge of hating it since i don't like it so much..

Hay nako.. anyway..
From Tomorrow until next sunday i will be AWOL again from the youth and from the world.. hay...

I Can't Believe it's been a Year.. Happy Anniversary You Guys..

Our story still hasn't ended and it's still ours..

Happy Birthday.. That's all I can say as of now, i'd love to say some more but i'd rather not.. but still you know what i want to say. Since i got a new job i guess i won't be seeing you as much as before.. but believe me when i say i miss you already. And from how i see it.. i'll miss you even more tomorrow and then next week.. and more in the following weeks after that..

So I guess since we I got a crappy sched and you got a perfect one i guess I'll just see you soon hun, maybe we'll go walking or jogging the next time we both got the time or go to dinner.. have a good one.. Love yah.. :)

Part 1

Stop this train.. i have to get off..
It's going to fast and i don't want to jump off..
PLEASE STOP THIS TRAIN?!
The Conductor is a madman and,
He killed the Engineer with his thoughts..
CAN ANYONE STOP THIS TRAIN!!
I want to get off already..
It's going to fast and it's gonna hurt if i jump off..

Grey Street..

Look at how she listens,
She says nothing of what she thinks,
She just goes stumbling through her memories
Staring out on to grey street.
She thinks, "Hey, how did I come to this?"
I dream myself a thousand times around the world
But I can't get out of this place.
There's an emptiness inside her
And she'll do anything to fill it in
But all the colors mix together - to grey
And it breaks her heart

How she wishes it was different
She prays to God most every night
And though she swears he might not listen
There's still a hope in her he might
She says "I pray oh But they fall on deaf ears,
am I supposed to take it on myself?
To get out of this place?"

There's an emptiness inside her
And she'll do anything to fill it in
And though it's red blood bleeding from her now
It's more like cold blue ice in her heart
She feels like kicking out all the windows
And setting fire to this life
She could change everything about her
Using colors bold and bright
But all the colors mix together - to grey
And it breaks her heart..

A Sad Sad Friday..

And so, Instead of hanging out with the churchies last night since the Deen's are in Lobo, Batangas hence the Roots ain't got nowhere to hang out in, i fell asleep instead.. I have no clue on how and why this happened. The last thing i remembered was texting Anton about following wherever they are going after the chuch service and watching a low budged wannabe version of Sinbad in HBO.. Sad Sad Sad Friday..

Anyway on other things.. it's just now that it's hitting me that it's extremely difficult finding a job in my profession. Sheesh.. hard to take in but now i actually believe what the rents have been saying for the past few months.. I'm not depressed and shit don't get me wrong, it's just frustrating in a way.. Maybe i should just take that ticket the states this July and see what's in store for me back there.

Work ourselves, fingers to the bone
Suck the marrow, drain my soul
Pay your dues, and your debts
Pay your RESPECTS, everybody tells you
You pay for what you get
You pay for what you get

Everybody asks me how she's doin'
Has she all this time? i don't know
what's with her, has she lost her mind?
I said, I couldn't tell you..
I'VE LOST MINE!!

Words, words, words, have you heard
A bird in hand is much better than,
Any number free to wander
Fly away... Stay
You pay for what you get

Everybody asks me how she's doing
Is she really ok like what she says?
Everybody asks me how she's doing
I said I couldn't tell you
but I'm OK I'm OK...

Surprise, surprise
You pay for what you get

Sun will shine no matter what I do
Sun shines bright now with you
What a wonderful thing for you to do
Moon shine bright
Reflection in your eyes
A finer place he could not find

Winter's cold
Spring erases
And the calm away by the storm is chasen
Everything good needs replacing
Hope all these changes happen with you

In my life
Never before have I a lover so adored
Her eyes
Her hair
Everything she says
My delight can tickle me inside
Touch my heart
Touch my mind

No matter what's inside I'll
Give to her
No need to satisfy my hunger
Lost in her
And while I spend these hours
Five senses reeling
With biggest steps I'm running
After her I will run

No matter what's inside I'll
Give to her
No need to satisfy my hunger
Lost in her
And while I spend these hours
Five senses reeling
With biggest steps I'm running
After her I will run

After her..

Low Cut Dwayne Wade's + Removed Ankle Support + a Really Physical Game of Ball in St. Cuenca Park = Ouch.. Sprained Ligamentless Ankle and I need Ice. I really don't know what to say anymore? maybe i should seriously listen to everyone na when they say "Hoy! Take care na nga of your knees and Ankles! You know they're weak na nga and you still do all that!!"..

To the Girl: Yes, i may deny it before but now i admit it.. I'm stubborn..

Starting tomorrow i will seriously take into consideration that taking care of my ankles and knees thing.. Promise.

Anyways..
Scenario: No Lights in the court, Sprained Ankle and a game of 21 with Chase, Carlo and Ean.
Me: Chase, I can beat you in this game with only one hand..
Chase: OK GAME!

And so.. instead of just beating Chase in the game.. I ended up beating Everyone with only one hand.. Hehehe.. told you i was good..

Tonight, Live in Manila.. I'm not really a fan, and according to my ears, the Love Mysterious album is not as great as the last one. But who knows maybe right after this event they change their mind..

Quote of the day:

"You make me want to be a better man.."
- Jack Nicholson

I'm hanging on
here until I'm gone
I'm right where I belong
just hanging on
even though
I watched you come and go
how was I to know
you'd steal the show
one day ill have enough to gamble
ill wait to hear your final call
and bet it all
I'm hanging on
here until I'm gone
I'm right where I belong
just hanging on
even though
passed this time alone
somewhere so unknown
it heals the soul
you'll ask for walls I'll build them higher
we'll lie in shadows of them all
I'd stand but they're much too tall
and I fall
Floating in the Dark!
Temporary scars!
February stars!

Mon's Problem

So.. what's Mon's problem. I can't seem to understand or to know when "Enough is Enough". Seriously, this has been an issue with me for the past Ten years.. and to be honest with you, this shitty ass mentality get's me to more shit compared to more good shit. i mean, i seriously don't understand why i'm even like this.. some people say "maybe becaus ever since birth you've had something against authority thus the mentality is implanted in you".. but c'mon i seriously doubt that. *sips on my dr. pepper* anyways, seriousy, i should get this shit out of my head.. this shit ain't healty no more.. specially now that i'm in the verge of something unusual... i'll explain more about that when i'm not intoxicated...

ps."i'm not sure but now a days i realize that i write more personalized entries when i'm intoxicated.. hahahahahaha!! NIIIIIIICE!!! RAAAW!!!

pps. I'm starting to hate constellations and the sky up above us.. and i refuse to say why.. maybe it's the alcohol talking but who knows?! maybe i do but maybe someone else does but who knows?! maybe you do?! or maybe he or she does?! or maybe your grandmother does but i sure don't know.. when you find out please tell me..

ppps. i went to the church of st. jude the other day, and st. jude supposedly is the "patron saint of the impossible" and i prayed to him for some impossible stuff that i needed. i dunno man.. but i think i'm just to eager about getting what i prayed for but yeah, i'm hoping he pulls through! i got faith in you brudda!! i'll still be cpraying

Bored.. and these Pictures from a Softer World simply explains what's going on inside my head right now..

Please sleep, my darling, sleep.
Your cry for inspiration, never reaches ears on distant stars.
And every night our lonely planet slides ACROSS THE UNIVERSE.
And I won't pretend I understand.

Please sleep, my darling, sleep.
Your death by information won't disturb the peace on DISTANT STARS.
And even when you lock the doors and slide behind the unlit shades,
None of us are strangers anymore.

So fall asleep with the windows open.
Come to me with the worst you've said and done.
You'll close your eyes and see me.
A little death makes life more meaningful.
I stand no chance at all.

Please sleep, my darling, sleep.
Your car crash in slow motion won't upset the pace on distant stars.
And one by one our years of OUR LIVES stumble as the moments pass.
So please hold on. Please hold on.

So fall asleep with the windows open.
Come to me with the worst you've said and done.
You'll close your eyes and see me.
A LITTLE DEATH makes life more meaningful.
I stand no chance at all.

Please sleep, my darling, sleep.

>

You gotta love them constellations man..
and yes Gians, i live for the challenge..

Kobe's 43 snaps his 50 point Streak



Kobe's 43 Point performance against the Golden State Warriors snaps his 4 game 50 point streak!

MVP!! MVP!! MVP!!

I'm Bored..

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion 46% Stability 80% Orderliness 43% Accommodation 63% Interdependence 50% Intellectual 76% Mystical 43% Artistic 76% Religious 83% Hedonism 83% Materialism 70% Narcissism 36% Adventurousness 56% Work ethic 70% Self absorbed 50% Conflict seeking 70% Need to dominate 63% Romantic 76% Avoidant 43% Anti-authority 90% Wealth 50% Dependency 50% Change averse 50% Cautiousness 50% Individuality 63% Sexuality 50% Peter pan complex 70% Physical security 90% Physical Fitness 30% Histrionic 23% Paranoia 56% Vanity 43% Hypersensitivity 50% Female cliche 23%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

66 Questions.. Why?! I'm still Bored..

1. Single or Taken:
No Idea..
2. Happy about:
Constellations
3. Sibling/s:
Sieg, Aby and Wowiecaster
4. Eye color:
Dark brown
5. shoe size:
12
6. Height:
5'10"
7. What are you wearing right now?
Shorts and a Shirt
8. Righty or lefty:
Righty
9. Can you make a dollar in change right now:
Yes
10. Best place to go for a date:
Beach.. Terazzas

=FAVORITES=
11. Kind of pants:
Slacks
12. Number:
3,4,5,6,7,8,11,13,15,24,81,84
13. Animals:
Emperor Penguins
14. Drink(non alcoholic):
Tampico
15. Sport to watch:
Football, Basketball, Tennis, Golf
16. Month
January, May, September, October, November and December
17. Juice:
Orange
18. Favorite cartoon character:
Speedy Gonzales, Peppi the Skunk and Heckle and Jeckle

=Have You Ever...=

19. Given anyone a bath:
Yup.. Sancho my Nephew
20. Made yourself throw-up?
Probably..
21. Gone skinny dipping?
I wish..
22. Eaten a dog?
Yup
23. Loved someone so much it made you cry?
Nope
24. Broken a bone?
Nope
25. Played truth or dare?
Yup
26. Been on a plane?
Yup
27. Came close to dying?:
Yup
28. Been in a sauna?
Yup
29. Been in a hotub?
Yup
30. Swam in the ocean?
Yup
31. Fallen asleep in school?
Always
32. Ran away?
Nope.. It's Pointless
33. Broken someone's heart?
Yup
34. Cried when someone died?
Yup
35. Cried in school?
Yup
36. Fell off your chair?
Yup
37. Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call?
Nope
38.Saved AIM conversations?
Yup
39. Made out with JUST a friend?
Yup
40. Used someone?
Probably
41. Been cheated on?
Nope

=What is...=

42. Your good luck charm?
The two bands i'm wearing right now
43. New fav. song?
Akon - Don't Matter
44. What is beside you?
Headphones, Ipod, Speakers, Ipod Plug, Earphones and a Table
45. Last thing you ate?
Mr. Chips
46. What kind of shampoo/conditioner:
Garnier

=Ever Had..=
47. Chicken pox:
Yup
48. Sore Throat:
Right Now
49. Stitches:
Yup
50. Broken nose:
Nope

=Do You...=
51. Believe in love at first sight?
Sometimes
52. Long distant relationships?
Sometimes
53. Like school?
Who likes school?!
54. Question?
Always
55. Who was the last person that called you?
My Mom
56. Who was the last person you slow danced with?
This girl who likes constellations
57. Who makes you smile the most?
This girl who likes constellations
58. Who knows you the best?
My Ipod and Headphones
59. Do you like filling these out:
Nope
60. Do you wear contact lenses or glasses?:
I refuse to
61. Do you like yourself:
Sometimes
62. Do you get along with your family?
Most of the time

=Are You...=

63. Obsessive Compulsive?
Nope
64. Suicidal?
Nope
65. What did you do yesterday?
Jogged and Got Sick
66. Hated someone in your life?
Yup

I'd rather dance with you than talk with you. So why don't we just move into the other room? There's space for us to shake, and hey, I like this tune.. Even if I could hear what you said, I doubt my reply would be interesting for you to hear.
Because I haven't read a single book all year and the only film I saw, I didn't like it at all.

I'd rather dance, I'd rather dance than talk with you..

The music's too loud and the noise from the crowd Increases the chance of misinterpretation. So let your hips do the talking and I'll make you laugh by acting like the guy who sings and you'll make me smile by really getting into the swing..

Getting into the swing, getting into the swing..
That's why I'd rather dance than talk with you..

Wedding, Boxing and One Cute Pope..

So in about three days time, My good friend will be married to his girlfriend of 5 months, and i think a few days. Oh yeah, i forgot to mention, they're both 24. According to him it's not a "shotgun wedding" or something that he just conjured up when he had indigestion, he said he actually put good thought to this before he asked the girls hand in marriage.. i dunno, maybe it wasn't indigestion he had, maybe it was hyperacidity..

Anyway, once again don't get me wrong, the woman he's about to marry is one of the sweetest people i've ever met. Not the prettiest i've ever seen, but you know, she's sweet nontheless. And for one thing, he's gonna be well taken care of with this girl and from what i see and how i know the guy, that's what he needs.. and that's what's important

I think i should stop right here.. i should be saying things like these.. i'm the freakin' best man for crying out loud!

Anyway, boxing?!, Pivot, Pivot, Straight, Jab, Hook, Uppercut, Weave.. i don't know man, i'd rather learn how to dance.. and yeah, i'd rather not start on that "Cute Pope" that's just way way off.. believe me...

Early Morning Blog..

Technically it's not early morning.. it's 9:00 am, it's just that i haven't actually written something this early in so long. Anyway, i seriously have to do something already, i'm bored to my witts..

According to Bri's blog i took our nutrition subject twice back in college.. well, that's according to him.. just so that you know, i only took it once, along with my other culinary related subjects..

Moving on, Madrid drew against Barcelona in the El Classico due to a late goal from Leonnel Messi and a screwed up defence.. also, the Lakers lose to the Mavs on what appears to be their worse loss in franchise history 108 - 72.

What is the world coming to!?!?!

Madridista's fall in Europe and the Bucks beat LALA

Seriously, these past few months could not get any more messed up. Yeah yeah, we all know the shit i'm right now, but other than that, i just don't understand why Madrid had to lose to the freakin' Germans and The Lakers to the Bucks.. I mean, c'mon man! give me freakin' break!

Kiss my ass Chris! Manchester ain't gonna win the Champions League! Dream on BOY!! hahaha!

So you think you've been through it all?
But I can't help but wonder now.
Yesterday I found my worst regret.
I'll hide it away so no one ever knows.

I'm dying.
I'm trying to leave.

Let me slip away. I'm barely holding on.
Every now and then I feel the end of us.

I never meant to say I'm sorry,
And I'm not sad to see you go.
We're human shapes burned on concrete walls.
These days the sun don't shine here anymore.

I'm dying.
I'm trying to leave.

Let me slip away. I'm barely holding on.
Every now and then I feel the end of us.
I laugh away. You breathe inside my head.
But something's gotta' change. I'm barely holding on.

Entry #601..

After 600 entries of no holds barred writing and expressing whatever it is that i got in this crazy head of mine, this is the first time i gonna be trying to watch what i write in this shit.. seriously, i can't believe i'm doing this and i am not jumping for joy that i'm doing this. For those interested on why i'm doing this.. just ask me through email.. i just don't want to get into more shit expressing myself.

Anyway, since i have to be "discreet" and all that.. here's what's been going on..

i feel like crap, i've been playing football, work is stupid, as always.. i'm the bad guy and i have to start learning how to dance.. clear enough for ya?

Scenario:

Dude1: Gotti.. why not change the address?
Me: Because it's such a hassle
Dude2: if you don't want to change the add, then just watch what you write
Me: Seriously, you expect me to do that?
Dude3: If you don't want to get into deeper shit then yeah.. or make a another one..
Me: another one.. hmmm..

I am not a lucky man...
You are like a butterfly
A Catipillars dream to fly
So bust out of this old cocoon
And dry your wings off
Butterfly
Go ahead, and fly

Its always such a lonely loom
Its sudden like a broken bone
And your luck wont always come along
So dry your tears away
Butterfly
Go ahead and fly

Dry your tears away
Butterfly
Dont you, Cry

It's really over, you made your stand
You got me crying, as was your plan
But when my loneliness is through, i'm gonna find another you

You take your sweaters
You take your time
You might have your reasons but you will never have my rhyme
I'm gonna sing my way away from blue
I'm gonna find another you

When i was your lover
No one else would do
If i'm forced to find another i hope she looks like you
Yeah and she's nicer too, yeah

So go on baby
Make your little get away
My pride will keep me company
And you just gave yours all away
Oh, now i'm gonna dress myself for two
Once for me and once for someone new
I'm gonna do some things you wouldn't let me do
Oh i'm gonna find another you

#41.. yeah you can say this is for you..

Come and see
I swear by now I'm playing time against my troubles
I'm coming slow but speeding...
Do you wish a dance and while I'm in the front
My play on time is won
But the difficulty is coming here...

I will go in this way
And find my own way out
I won't tell you to stay
But Its coming to much more...
Me..
All at once the ghosts come back
Reeling in you now
What if they came down crushing?
It used to be
that you and me
play for all of the loneliness
that nobody notices now
I'm begging slow I'm coming here...
im waiting I wanted to stay

I wanted to stay
i wanted to play
I wanted to love you

I'm only this far
And only tomorrow leads my way

I'm coming waltzing back
and moving into your head
Please, I wouldn't pass this by
Oh, and I wouldn't take any more than
What sort of man goes by?
I will bring water
Why won't you ever be glad?
It melts into wonder
I came in praying for you
Why won't you run in to rain and pray?
Let tears splash all over you

Change and Adapt.. Make it so you'd never ever feel this way ever again..

Valentine's Day.....

Seriously.. This is why falling in love is too God Damn HARD!!! and this is why i hate this day. You know, to be honest with you, this is the first time in a very very long time that i actually tried to celebrate this day. For the past i don't really know, God knows how long,i have been spending Valentines either hanging with my friends wasted or just sleep through it. It just had to be this year... the year where i planned on actually spending it.. where it has to come down.. all cards lay down flat.. which from what i know is somewhat a good thing but somewhat bad.. since i know she's holding 2 the aces and i'm holding a 2 and a 3 relying on the river for a straight.. so far the river hasn't come out yet.. i'm still hoping i get the straight...

I'm in the Piano you're in the Kitchen.. Tough luck..

You know if i could get you that much Orange Emperor Tulips, i would right? Happy Valentines Day.. Ciao Bella!

1dayyoullbethere

You’re sailing through the air to nowhere
the trajectory unclear
but it feels like it’s somewhere
don’t really care if you land or you fall
because it’s not up to you
don’t you know that it should be?

Sign on the dotted line for an unlimited time
but you still won’t know

You feel a hundred feet tall
you see all the things that you could do
but they’re not what you’re doing
Everyone knows where you stand
but you can never see it for yourself
Don’t you know that you should be?

Sign on the dotted line for an unlimited time
but you still won’t know..
and it won't matter at all..
knowing One Day You'll be there..

Run to the Sun..

Though you know i'm feelin' blue..
And you'll do what you must do..
I hope you know..
I'd hand the skies to you..

I'm so embarrassed for mankind..
They have the nerve to let their weapon shine..
They're so stupid..
Do they not know you're about to fly high..
Away..

With the wings that God will give you someday..
I'm not jealous..
I just can't take it..
S.O.S. to your ears, the only thing I ever feared was this day..
And having to say..

It goes while you're here
I wanna tell you something
It's that "I love you girl"
Yeah, and I wish we could run to the sun
And never come back
Yeah..

Seriously.. and this time, i'm not drunk..

I'm not a person who accepts defeat just like that.. For those who REALLY know me, i may not show that i'm like that.. but deep inside i am.. i do not know when enough is enough.. your gonna have to tell me when enough is enough for me to actually know that whatever i'm doing is enough.. may it be good or bad. Some say it's a good trait, they say i'm a "fighter" for being like that, but in all honesty, that so called trait either get's me into so much trouble or into so much shit more than it gets me to what it is that i really want...

So anyway, this is addressed to you and you know who you are. Yeah, ok.. first up, FINE!!, you win. It's hard for me to swallow this and you know that.. YOU WIN!

I mean, just to explain myself.. you got me.. i fell into the God forsaken ditch.. it's not deep yeah? and i wasn't actually expecting you to actually try and catch me, but i was kinda hoping you'd give me hand you know? at least a helping hand so it would be easier for me to get up since we go way back.. but you didn't since like what you said "you rather just keep everything inside rather than just say it" so.. i imagine you, just standing infront of the ditch watching me crawl up.. The only good thing that i can remember right now is while i'm crawling up, you were still talking to me yeah? and we're still calling each other names like "Jack" or something that's in the breakfast menu of this restaurant that serves really good tacos.. Funny because i feel so stupid to actually think that i'd get "Kudos" from you for trying to get out of that ditch by myself.. i guess i was wrong.. or maybe you're just like that since you don't say much when it comes to things like that.

Do I Sound Emo? or Do i sound like you? if and that's only if.. you actually say something..

Anyway, i'm not saying goodbye, since i'm still gonna be here and this is my space.. i was here first.. You know what, If this happens to a normal person, he or she would probably just stop everything and just walk away.. never to be seen by you or the others connected to you (you know who i'm talking about).. but like i said.. like they said.. "I'm a fighter".. i just don't know when to give up.. there you go..

You've may have won this battle... but from what i see.. we've only just begun..

The First Tagalog Blog of the Year..

Kasi Ganito yan eh.. kahit anong gawin ko, kahit anong pa-ikot-ikot ko sa kama ko, kahit anong laro ko ng futbol, punta sa gym at magpaka pagod at tumakbo pa-iko-ikot sa loob nang alabang.. may gusto talaga ako sa iyo. Akala ko na pag ginawa ko lahat ng gusto ko, makakalimutan ko ang aking pagnanais sa iyo, ngunit hindi talaga.. Nasabi ko pa nga na ipagpapalit ko ang aking futbol para sa iyo at at least nandun ako kung nasaan ka? sus mariya! eh kung sa nanay ko hindi ko magawa yon.. eh sino ka ba? isang sabi mo lang gagwin ko na.. easy lang ha! tancha ko, di lang kita gusto.. ewan ko ba kung ano yung tawag sa termino na mas malupit pa sa "di lang kita gusto" pero malamang yun na yun.. Bahala ka na kung ano tawag dun.. basta.. yun na yun..

Your results:
You are Juggernaut

Juggernaut 66% Apocalypse 61% Mystique 58% Kingpin 57% Magneto 56% Dark Phoenix 56% The Joker 55% Lex Luthor 55% Mr. Freeze 53% Catwoman 52% Dr. Doom 52% Venom 50% Green Goblin 50% Two-Face 42% Riddler 37% Poison Ivy 36%

Your strength and determination are difficult to stop.

Click here to take the Supervillain Personality Quiz

The Phenom Moves to San Siro



The Phenomenon Ronaldo Moves to AC Milan tonight.. Today is a sad day for Madridistas.
Thank You and Good Luck R9!

Can't Get My Hands On

I should have turned back,
I should have known better,
i should have walked away on the feeling,

i said it tonight, i'll say it forever,
and this time i really gonna mean it...
Have you ever heard me scream i love you?
this place is safe and sound
Your probably glued on t.v.
Your something i can't get my hands on..
This isn't what I imagined..

I'd like for this to end..
I'd like for this to stop
Your something i can't get my hands on..

The last time I saw you, you turned away..
Maybe you couldn't see me with the sun shining in your eyes..
I said, 'Hello,' but you kept on walking..
Maybe you've gone deaf from the sound of the people laughing..

The last time I saw you, you turned away..
Maybe You couldn't hear me with my voice ringing in your ears.
Do you remember we used to hang sometimes?
Maybe you couldn't feel Me.. Since i may always feel so far away..

The first time I saw you, didn't turn away..
It was funny since there were a lot of people in our way..
I said, 'Hello,' and you stopped walking.
Maybe because before i haven't got any feelings that were blocking..

The first time I saw you, you didn't turn away.
We even sang jack johnson with screaming noises ringing in our ears..
Do you remember where we to hang sometimes?
I don't know why you couldn't feel me.. I was never far away..

If I could, I'd only wanna' make you smile...
If you wanna' stay with me a while...

The next time I see you, you'll turn away...
I'll say, 'Hello,' but you'll keep on walking...
The next time you see me.. I think.. I'll turn away...

But Still..
If I could, I'd only wanna' make you smile...
If you wanna' you could stay with me a while...

(Edited form the +44 song..)

The Statement..

I Hope and pray you get to read this.. this is the side that you wish not to see, not to acknowledge, and i bet you don't want to hear.. this is my statement to you..

It started with a song about the rain and breakfast and evolved to being the unforseen connections to what's a beautiful relationship now.. we never thought it would come to this.. maybe it's just me.. i never thought, imagined and even put an idea to this happening, but it did. At the begining i never wanted this but something inside told me that i wouldn't be able to get away from this so i accepted it..

For whatever it's worth, yeah i still do.. what's there to actually do something about it? i mean, it's there i can't take it out of my system, no matter what i do. Actually, it's feels miserable in a good way to actually acknowledge this towards you since for some reason i know it's not right, or maybe not the right time.. and knowing that if does push through which i doubt.. it's going to be, as society would probably put it pretty fucked up.. i don't know if you'd care, but from what you say you are is what you are, you shouldn't.. because i sure don't..

I've said my piece.. now it's your turn..

23

Rise and shine, make you wanna say
Dear God, let me thank you for another day
For livin' life on the edge and I'm tryin' to break it
Tired of duckin' the shits, but it's a struggle to make it
So this is your day homey, now it's time to shine
If a player's only trickin', you can wine and dine
Stress free from the drama, better go get your ticket
Then come on cause some squares can't lie to kick it
It feels good not to grind no moreDon't get it twisted cause I still hustle
Maintainin' just tryin' to reach my goal
Livin' life truly successful
So that my little soldier never have to sell no dope
All the Cutties from the pens comin' home again
And we ain't tryin' to kill each other cause brother we all in
Beautiful women give 'em much respect
And ain't no funk 'tween the east and the west
It's just a Player Holiday

Today's the day the Players play
So you better be on your way
Now it's time to celebrate
Hurry up and don't be late
Cause you know it's gonna be a...

Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day
Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day
Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day
Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day

January 15 the year 07
We gettin' all the money and we ain't through clownin'
You can tell everybody that stays around your way
Today is the official Player's Holiday
YO VIC!! I'm lovin' every minute of it
Cause ballin's been around since the beginning of it
We barbecuin' chicken, that's what we doin'
Buy some breezys and we kickin'
And BRI what you doin?

He's just sittin there timin' like a Rolex watch
I figured by now y'all realize that Hip-Hop and Rap won't stop
Puttin' it together like a racing track
Where's all my Latino, Filipino, and Ese partners at?
I know you feel me when I say that life's a struggle
But God first, y'all know we all can't help but bubble
So keep your head up
And know that things are changing for the better
Talkin' 'bout the youth, the little kids
Forget about you, never

Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day
Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day
Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day
Lovely day, lovely day, lovely day, lovely day

A Minute for Your Son (Part 2)

I look at life a little different now, since you hugged me
And I always loved my peoples, but now they love me
Thank you for the love Lord, we praise ya
Jacob's descendants, from Africa to Asia
Pleadin the blood of Christ over our life
Wrong or right, just help us make it through the night and we'll
shout yo' name in times of need
And times of joy, and, when we bleed
And, when we are overcome with greed
You ain't gon' half to tell me twice, I'ma take heed
And because of what you've given me, I know you'll deliver me
And I won't drown no matter how deep the river be
You are the strength I, never knew I had
Kept the heart good when they told me it was bad
All praises due to ya
That's why I had to dedicate somethin new to ya, thank you father

1st Entry..

Start the year right, Outreach last week at St. Andrews Church in La Huerta somewhere in the Paranaque area. Doing this makes you feel humble and a little bit lucky that your not the one being given rations of food and a free meal.. 300 + people showed up and we were just 50 +. Hard yeah? but that's how it is, not a lot of people would sacrifice a perfectly good saturday to serve the less fortunate.. to be honest i wasn't even supposed to show up, i just wasn't doing anything so there.. but nevertheless i was there and i helped.. "kaching!! one point in my Heavenly Acoount" hehe..

Anyway, there isn't much to talk about as of now since it's just the second week of the month and the year.. also there isn't much to say about my job hunting since alot of callcenters have been annoying my ass for the past few days.. i'm seriously not interested in that line of work.. I mean, answering phones and hearing complains from americans?! what the hell.. just can't handle that shit (No Offense to Bri, Tik and my other friends that works in one).. i just refuse to be a slave hooked up to a phone while sitting in front of a computer in the wee hours of the morning listening to screaming anerican red neck garbage who i know has far less education than i have..

Just yesterday, i just found out that we might actually migrate to Canada before this year ends.. so i guess the states is postponed for me (sarcastically jumping for joy). Postponed for a worse fate before November this year.. oh well.. Like what i always say "C'est La Vie".. just go with the flow and adapt to the new environment. Fuck..

Anyway.

Earth to Bella.. you think you've got it all figured in..
Earth to Bella.. Everything you know is wrong.. Well, almost..
Earth to Bella.. I see where you are not listening
I bear the burden of being the voice that let's you know
We all grow old.. And before you swim you've gotta be okay to sink

Earth to Bella.. The world can be an unfriendly place
So hold your head up.. Do your best to save some face
It's not so hard.. Just undo yourself and see your second sun
Ascend..

2006..

So it's goodbye 2006 and whattup to 2007.. Like every year, we got good days and bad days and all that, but to sum it all up this year was good.. Italy won the World cup for the 4th time, Miami wins the NBA Championship fot the first time, Canavarro, Emerson and van Nistelrooy goes to Real Madrid just name a few good things.. though Juventus was Relagated to Serie B due to the Calciopoli Scandal, at least they are doing well.. well.. that's just for sports..

About me.. well, my graduation was this year's peak.. other than that.. well, i got nothing more. maybe there are some but it ain't as significant as that.

Anyway.. 2006 signing out.. the next entry is next year.. PEACE!!!

You Only Know What you see.. You Don't Understand what it takes to Be Me...

A Minute for your Son (Part 1)

You got a minute for your son father? I need to talk..
I'm so tired of tryin to run father, let's take a walk..
I'm so sorry for what I done father, it ain't my fault..
But the devil's been on my back lately, he's like a hawk
You never give us more than we can handle, but it's gettin hard
And I'm a strong individual, but I need you God
Lot of things that I used to, I don't wanna
run the streets like I used to, I know I'm gonna
speak the word for you one day
Up in there like, "Hallelujah!" on Sunday
I thank you Lord for the blessings that you gave me
And for my life with the blessings you have saved me
And for my life you have carried me enough times - and that's the truth
stuck with me to rough times, throughout my youth
And through it all I saw that you was still with me
I was that one lost sheep and you was comin to get me..

Relapse...

Maybe i'm just drunk.. or maybe it's real since i've been feeling this for the past few days, and i can still type my HTML codes properly.. or maybe weeks.. i just don't speak about it. Just so that you know, i feel much better than before. it's just a relapse.. maybe an indigestion.. or maybe i just got too much to drink (two pitchers of beer all to myslef maybe!?) or maybe it's real.. i don't know. all i know is it's just not right.. maybe not right now.. maybe not tomorrow.. or next year.. or in five or ten years... or God know how long.. or maybe it's just a relapse... or maybe i just miss her, or maybe i want to be with her. God knows.. because i sure don't...

Ruud Misses the Winning Penalty..



After coming back from being down 2-0 , Ruud Van Nistelrooy, on the 89th minute missed what should have been the winning goal against Olympique Lyonnaise on match day 5 of the UEFA Champions League. Nevertheless, their 2-2 draw secures the whites a place in the final 16 knock-out phase.

---

It's really over, you made your stand
You got me stunned, as well as you planned
But when my loneliness is through,
.... I'm gonna find another you

You take your sweaters
You take your time
You might have your reasons but you will never have my rhymes
I'm gonna sing my way away from blue
.... I'm gonna find another you

When i was your lover
No one else would do
If i'm forced to find another i hope she looks like you
Yeah and she's nicer too

So go on baby
Make your little get away
My pride will keep me company
And you just gave yours all away
Now i'm gonna dress myself for two
Once for me and once for someone new
I'm gonna do somethings you wouldn't let me do
.... I'm gonna find another you

It's a good day to be a Filipino



MANNY PACQUIAO FOR PRESIDENT! HAHAHAHA!

Happy Expiration..

This month officially marks my fourth year of blogging.. what can i say? four years of compiled episodes, epiphanies, free verse thoughts, spoken word and much morse crazy shit that i can't even think about anymore.. haha! well.. after four years, still.. CAN IT BE ALL THAT SIMPLE?!... now i can say Yes it can. This past four years has taught me alot of crazy shit about this so called life of ours but just a few months back (or maybe i just realized it just a few months back but i've been doing it all along) that we can refuse not to make our life complicated and adapt to what's there in front of us so that everything would be straight.. i haven't got the whole thing about this out of my head yet so feel free to ask or email me about this shit..

Anyway, haven't blogged for almost a month.. why? blame my playstation and Final Fanatsy 12. Yeah, Yeah, i know i know.. there's too much angst in my blog but i become a dork in front of the freakin Playstation! Whatever!.. say what you want.. if it's a good game, i'm playing it! hahaha moving on.. i still refuse to get a job, planning to postpone it to after christmas but i'll be passing my resume around starting tomorrow..


well.. that's it for now.. hope i blog tomorrow..

"This is a blog without tight production. The Content is just as important as the passion and meaning the average reader reads, Thus making the Lyricist's job difficult. 4 years made and still a lot to go with both Lyricist-slash-Experiences, Don't get it twisted. It's still not a game..
CAN IT BE ALL THAT SIMPLE!?"

HALA MADRID!! 2 - 0 IN THE EL CLASSICO!



MADRID WINS THE FIRST LEG OF THE EL CLASSICO WITH AN EARLY GOAL FROM RAUL AND AN EARLY 2ND HALF GOAL FROM RUUD VAN NISTELROOY!

HALA MADRID!

Bumming with 260 Gigs of Memory and the Semi - Family Reunion..

A week after my well deserved march on the stage of PICC.. i am bored to my skull. I'm seriously in need of something to do other than hang around the house online and trip with the Playstation. One of these days, i swear to God i might just take up Tai-Chi and knitting just so that i could eliminate this boredom.

6 Years in the Making..

Finally.. after years and years of Unwanted subjects (Algebra 101 and Business Math 2), Crappy ass inconsiderate professors (you know who you are..), Countless hours of long breaks, Subjects from 6 - 9 pm, field trips to Banaue, Subic, Singapore - Brunei and to God knows where, Long Enrollment and Adjustment lines, Sleepless nights right before course card distributions, 0.0's and R's to 1.0's to 4.0 grades, Short Term-Breaks (1 week worth and it includes adjustment and enrollment), 1 month worth of summer vacations, leave of absences, floods in taft avenue and an overnight stay in Angelo king since we couldn't head out because of the flood, girls with hazel eyes and girls with gullible behaviors, thousands of oil burns in my hand, a million cuts from different kinds of knives, messed up chefs coats and after function after function after function..... i finally made it.... as of 11:30 am this morning.. i am a graduate. and you know what.. without those complains i listed above, the six years i have gone throught in the College of Saint Benilde wouldn't be as significant as it..

To all the crazy ass professors who's got serious issues against me and said that i wouldn't make it.. "I throw my middle finger to you guys.. FUCK YOU ALL!! hahaha!"

To all my mentors especially Mr. Gil Acuna, Chef Pam Obieta, Chef Joey Lontoc, Chef Joey Pratts, Chef Jo Tan, Ms. Del Ignacio, Mr. Alfonso Dangat, Mr. Jamie Flores, Mr. Lem Cacho, Mr. Arun Gogna, Mr. Angelo Lacson, Chef Shirley Joseph and Chef Bambi Lichauco.. "Tonight I drink to you Guys.. Thank you for the support.."

To all my blockmates and friends.. Brian, JJ, Jon, Aaron, Veto, Mitch, Car Car, Rica, Tina, Grace, Paul Tan, Cesca, Gina, Gabal, Cai, Tasha, Issa, Ayni, Ainee, Ackee, the whole batch 101 H11, Cathy, Catherine, Jona, Pam, Jec, Matt, Celine, Angelo, JC, Levs, Del, Felix, Hachie, Laurie, Mallows, Cleo, Claud, The Starback Crew and to Christopher's Chicken Chicken.. "We Drink tonight.. Thank you"

To all My brothers Down South, The 7th district of AAV to the Roots, to the people that's been down since day 1.. Thank you..

Lastly to God and the Dynasty.. Thank you.. no words can express my gratitude especially to my father.. who's stuck with me through out.. i got nothing but love..

PEACE.. To the Next Step!

5 - 1 Against Dynamo Kyiv and The All Time Champions League Top Scorer

After the heartbreaking 2 - 0 Loss to Olympique Lyonnaise two weeks ago, the Whites massacre Dynamo Kyiv with a 5 -1 win on their Champion's League home debut, thanks to 2 goals from Van Nistelrooy, 1 from Reyes and another 2 from the Spanish Captain Raul which makes him he all time Champions League top scorer.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

...

This is just stupid but there ain't nothing else to do..
Rules:
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn’t make sense. NO CHEATING!
*(Note: I added part of the lyrics too)


1. How are you feeling today?
"Better Dayz" - 2Pac Shakur

Better Dayz, Better Dayz Better Dayz.. Heeey!
Got Me Thinking Bout Better Dayz..

2. Will you get far in life?
"Greece 2000" - Three Drives on a Vinyl

3. How will your friends see you?
"Subteranean Homesick Alien" - Radio Head

The breath of the morning,
I keep forgetting
The smell of the warm summer air.
I live in a town
Where you can't smell a thing,
You watch your feet
For cracks in the pavement

4. Will you get married?
"Sky is the Limit" - The Notorious B.I.G.

Sky is the limit and you know that you can have
what you want, be what you want, have what you want, be what you want

5. What is your best friend's theme song?
"Louisiana Bayou" - Dave Matthews Band

Money on the bed but you aint got to go
Sold your soul just tryin to get overload
No EMPTY pocket gonna keep ya from gettin yours
No judge or jury ever gonna hear their story told

6. What is the story of your life?
"This Means War!!" - Busta Rhymes feat. Ozzy Osbourne (PERFECT!! hehe)

Take a look inside
You can run and you can hide
If you cross my path
I'll make sure you feel my wrath
Give and you receive
Cherish every breath you breathe
Scriptures on the wall
Those who betray all must fall

7. What was high school like?
"Dinner with the CEO" - Ice Cube

8. How can you get ahead in life?
"Travelling Without Moving" - Jamiroquai

Speed freak
Faster than a speedin' bullet,
Slow down, if I don't,
If I don't I might just lose it
Locked up
You've got me honey
Locked up under heavy braking
yeah yeah
You know I've got to hang on
Drive too fast I might be last
oh yeah

9. What is the best thing about your friends?
"Sun Child" - The Vines

10. What is today gonna be like?
"Back to Life 2001" - DJ Clue

11. What is in store for this weekend?
"The Streets R Deathrow" - 2Pac Shakur

12. What song describes you?
"Nuthin But a "G" Thang" - Dr. Dre feat. Snoop Dogg

(Too Lazy to write the whole song but this is perfect!)

13. To describe your grandparents?
"Sunday Morning" - Maroon 5

14. How is your life going?
"Ants Marching" - Dave Matthews Band

(Too Lazy to write the whole song but this is perfect!)

15. What song will they play at your funeral?
"History" - The Outlawz

16. How does the world see you?
"Banquet" - Bloc Party

17. Will you have a happy life?
"Supersonic" - Oasis

18. What do your friends really think of you?
"Nice to know you" - Incubus

19. How can I make myself happy?
"Where Are You Going" - Dave Matthews Band

20. What should you do with your life?
"Imagine" - John Lennon

(Too Lazy to write the whole song but this is perfect!)

21. Will you ever have children?
"Pantala Naga Pampa" - Dave Matthews Band

TUPAC AMARU SHAKUR
JUNE 16, 1971 - SEPTEMBER 13, 1996

...

Eversince the passing of Tita The atmosphere here in the residence has been dismal. I don't blame anyone though, i guess it's just really like that. And because of which i can't bare to stay home for no more than 10 hours. I mean, I literally just stay out the porch and sound trip just so that i can get out of this murky environment. I can't take this no more.. no disrespect or anything.. just keeping it real.

So what's been up lately?! 32 hours left on my internship, so i'm guessing that's less than a week. I'm just a bit worried since i got used to working that, what will i be doing in the next few weeks right before graduation? hmmm.. i can imagine the boredom and the countless hours on the tube playing Playstation. Sheesh.. this is a good thing right? i mean, getting used to working and shit?! oh well, c'est la vie..

ok.. i'm out of words.. till next time

A Farewell and So Far So Good..

"Everyone must leave something behind when he dies. A child or a book or a painting or a house or a wall built or a pair of shoes made. Or a garden planted. Something your hand touched some way so your soul has somewhere to go when you die, and when people look at that tree or that flower you planted, you're there.
It doesn't matter what you do, he said, so long as you change something from the way it was before you touched it into something that's like you after you take your hands away. The difference between the man or woman who just cuts lawns and a real gardener is in the touching, he said. The lawn cutter might just as well not have been there at all; the gardener will be there a lifetime."

"You will be missed Tita Maripi.."

---

So far so good, 80 hours left in my internship and i'm on my way to the stage of Philippine International Convention Center's Plenary Hall, I just hope i don't do anything stupid to jinx that. Anyway, since i'm in my last few hours of kitchen duty, i am already being assigned to do advanced things like, making Genache and Italian Cream Filling in the Pastry Kitchen, Taragon Gravy and Hollandaise Sauces and such in the Hot kitchen to plating for functions with 200 people or more in it. Tiring yeah? but this is what i do best and i love what i do, and i live for this shit. It's actually an honor to be able to do these things since i'm just an intern. I guess i have already gained their trust towards kitchen work.

On other things, Happy Birthday Banana Pancakes, Miguel Herrera, Therese Castro, Chef Tina Velasco and Kevin Choy!! To another dramatic year to all of you!!

I sincerly ask for your prayers. My tita Maripi is currently in the Asian Hospital's ICU, suffering from a stroke. A hemmorage in the brain was the cause of all this. At this point only your prayers and miracle could save her.. Please..